*Yawn*
You know how the BeDazzler adds lovely sparkle to anything in the world? Well, anything denim in the world? Just a quick ka-pow and a little life has been added to a spankin' fine Wal-Mart shoppin' outfit.Well, dammit, y'all, someone has shot me with a BeDraggler. I am not sparkly and I add no life to denim. Perhaps I'm BeDraggled because it's Friday and I'm tired. Perhaps I'm BeDraggled because my 3 month old decided that 3 AM is the most wunnerful time in the world to nurse for an entire hour straight. Perhaps I'm BeDraggled because instead of eating breakfast and having some sort of yogurt-y, sweet-ish, smoothie type thing, I'm blogging.
Anyway, do they sell the BeDraggler on HSN? Because I'd like to buy one. Then I would go to the mall, hide my non-stop-talking four-year-old, my no-sleep-needing three-month-old, our piles and piles of crap we need to leave the house, the stroller, and my non-bedazzled denim-clad ass all behind a pillar of some sort. Then I would scope out any person that looks like she has it completely together and instead of asking her how she does it, I would shoot her with the BeDraggler, ka-pow. I would briefly revel in some selfish schadenfreude. Then I would drag my cavalcade of chaos over to her side and commiserate.
See how the BeDraggler could really bring us all together?
Well, no it couldn't.
I'm just kind of bitchy today.
posted by haikumama @ 8:29 AM
4 Comments:
i am 100% behind the bedraggler. because, if you can't say something nice . . . come sit by me.
plus, there are never enough opportunities to use "schadenfreude" correctly in a sentence.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
The other name for "BeDraggler" is "having kids."
It comes with the territory. I feel your pain, Mama. I feel your pain.
what kim said.
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